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Specialty tag(s): Divorce Coaching, Divorce for Men, Divorce for Women, Pre-Divorce Guidance, Divorce

Signs That Your Spouse Wants a Divorce

Eric Robertson | April 9, 2025

Marriage is a partnership built on mutual effort, commitment, and communication, which is why it can be so disheartening to sense when something is wrong and you find yourself questioning whether you and your spouse are just in a rough patch or if it’s something more serious. This uncertainty can be painful and have you second-guessing every aspect of your relationship. If you’re struggling with these doubts, you’re not alone. Many people experience the fear and anxiety of losing their marriage, and it’s important to be able to identify the signs your spouse wants a divorce in order to either calm your fears or take action to address the issue.

Potential Signs Your Spouse Has Given Up on Your Marriage

Emotionally and/or Physically Distant

One of the most common signs that your spouse wants a divorce is distance, either physical or emotional. Conversations often become brief, superficial, and devoid of connection when a spouse is considering divorce, and they tend to have little interest in engaging in anything substantial or meaningful. They stop checking in on you, disregard your concerns, and show indifference to your emotions. This emotional disconnect can also manifest itself physically, with one spouse avoiding the other. Consistently moving to another room in the home or finding an excuse to leave for a few hours is one of the most common signs your husband or wife wants a divorce. It’s important to note that there’s a difference in a short-term periods of heightened stress that might contribute to disengagement and the prolonged breakdown of emotional or physical engagement that could be indicative of larger issues within the marriage.

Lack of Intimacy

Physical intimacy is important in most people’s marriages, and a sudden decrease can be one of the signs that your husband has lost interest or your wife has checked out of the marriage. Spouses considering a divorce will commonly stop showing affection, avoid physical contact, and overall seem uninterested in rekindling closeness. Intimacy is an essential aspect of a healthy marriage for most couples, and a prolonged lack of it may indicate deeper issues that need to be addressed.

Refusal to Work on Issues

Every marriage has challenges, but a spouse refusing to discuss or work through problems can be one of the signs your husband or wife has given up on your marriage. If your partner shows no interest in resolving conflicts or attending counseling, they may have already decided that the marriage is over.

Disrespectful or Overly Critical

Criticism and contempt are significant red flags in a marriage. If your spouse has started belittling you, dismisses your opinions, or speaks disrespectfully to you, there’s a chance it’s because they no longer respect you or care about the future of the relationship. This can be one of the signs your husband has checked out of the marriage or your wife is emotionally detaching.

Busy or “Working Late” a Lot

When a spouse suddenly starts spending more time at work or is “too busy” to check in with you, it may be because they’re avoiding you. While there is the possibility that your spouse really is just having a hectic time at work, consistently avoiding coming home, paired with myriad other signs of trouble, could be a warning that they’re thinking about divorce.

Higher Than Usual Interest in Their Appearance

A sudden, unexplained focus on appearance, such as a drastic change in wardrobe, weight loss, or increased grooming, can sometimes be one of the signs your spouse is seeking attention elsewhere. This, in a vacuum, might not be indicative of anything, but when paired with other signs of disinterest in the marriage, may be significant.

Acting Secretively

A spouse who starts guarding their phone, changing passwords, or hiding their activities may be keeping something from you. Certainly, everyone is entitled to their privacy, but a dramatic increase in secrecy can be one of the signs your wife has given up on your marriage or your husband has started considering divorce.

What to Do Next

Recognizing the signs that a husband or wife has checked out of a marriage can be painful, but it’s important to address them proactively and strive for effective communication and openness so that issues within the relationship don’t compound and fester. If you suspect that your spouse has emotionally or physically withdrawn from the marriage, consider having an honest conversation about your concerns. In some cases, professional counseling or legal guidance may be necessary.

At Goranson Bain Ausley, we understand how difficult these situations can be. If you need legal advice about your marriage and potential divorce, our experienced divorce attorneys and divorce coach can help you navigate the process with clarity and confidence. Contact us today to schedule a consultation.

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